html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> From the archives: I do like artichokes.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

I do like artichokes.

Margie sent me this:
"The key with blowjobs is to scrape like you're eating an artichoke leaf."
I used to think I had some modest skill with such things, but it has been so long that technique has apparently changed. Thank god I found out before I embarrassed myself.




UPDATE: Margie tells me the line was from the comments on Unfogged. I'm not surprised.

15 Comments:

Blogger Geoff said...

Whimper

8:02 AM  
Anonymous D said...

unless you have bad teeth.

9:30 AM  
Anonymous mith said...

Not only are they comments from Unfogged, they're comments from a post asking for the worst sex advice you've ever received.

Keep that in mind before re-evaluating your technique.

--mith

9:52 AM  
Blogger TonyT said...

Teeth=BAD

9:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Megan, you did not capitalize God. Since you are very precise and intentional in your writing, I would like your thoughts on this matter.

If it was intentionally uncapitalized, I would like to hear your reasoning. For if you think a Deity exists, is the Deity's name not at least as worthy of capitalizing as a proper noun say the name Megan?

And if the Deity does not in your estimation exist, why invoke it, even if in jest, or as part of a cultural remnant? In fact, if you are in doubt enough of the Deity's existence to not capitalize the Deity's name, why invoke the Deity at all, even uncapitalized)?

By the way, I am a faith-based atheist. That is, I think the question of God's existence is moot, but instinctively favor His non-existence. But since I can't prove it either way, I see no harm in showing a little respect and treating His (Her?) name as proper noun.

12:23 PM  
Blogger Lora said...

That was kind of a random question, but now that it's been asked, I'm kind of curious what your answer is, Megan.

Personally, I don't capitalize "god" because I always thought "God" referred to the one god of the Western faiths (Christianity, Islam, Judaism).

2:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

anonymous 12:23 absolutely has to be a parody troll.

5:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I (anonymous 12:33) am *not* a parody troll.

My question was meant seriously.

Megan has strong and articulate opinions on nearly everything. And I am curious about this. It's not an important thing, I admit, but I *am* curious.

5:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You might have skills in such matters, but we would never know since you don't blog about the perfect blowjob.

8:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

modest skill?

8:25 PM  
Blogger Uneasy Rhetoric said...

Re: artichoke jobs, ow. Re: G/god:

Faith-based atheist? Isn't that just a brand of agnostic?

9:16 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

I'm surprised at the depth of your interest, but I'll answer, I guess. The funny thing is that I did linger over "Thank god" for a couple seconds. But I wasn't thinking anything like you described. I was thinking, as best as I can reproduce it:

thank god? eh - maybe not, bugs some people, but it is exactly what I would say... downbeat on the god, do I italicize? No, too heavy. Switch to 'thank goodness'? no, takes too long, the joke is pretty weak, so I have to rush them along to the end. variant like gawd? would hit my real vowel tones, but too obtrusive. (very faint) capitalize? whatever. It is a three line blog post. It isn't that important.

And then you asked me what my very precise reasoning was, and I have to confess that it had nothing to do with faith.

Also, of course I have to give the attribution now that I know it, but it nearly completely kills the joke. The post would be way more spare and random without that.

10:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9:07 AM  
Blogger Megan said...

A12:33:

Could you please delete your comment, and re-write it in accordance with my affirmative kindness comment policy. You can say nothing to Uneasy Rhetoric, or you can answer his question in good faith, or you can reach for even more compassion and answer him as you would a good friend.

If you haven't done that by early afternoon, I'll delete it, and keep the kind parts in my explanation. Thank you.

10:51 AM  
Blogger Megan said...

A12:33's comment at 9:07 said:

"Dear Megan,

This is anonymous 12:33.

Thank you very much for answering my question about your use of "thank god". As always, your response was very interesting!"

And other things that weren't as kind as I require here.

3:15 PM  

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