html xmlns="" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> From the archives: Esperanza, now there's a name.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Esperanza, now there's a name.

I just read about "Fox anchor Megyn Kelly". I believe in open-minded love and acceptance of all human foibles, but 'Megyn' is just egregious. Her parents have a lot of be ashamed of.

While we're at it, I think naming a child Dolores is awful. The sound is pretty, but why would you ever invoke that for your baby?

UPDATE: My sister points out that the name Tristan is just as bad. Parents, do not name your children this.

P.S. Like the hippie I am, I think a lot of unconventional names are great. I'll be bummed if there is a lot of out-group bashing without reasons besides unfamiliarity.


Anonymous Ennis said...

Somebody gives birth, and you wonder why they name their child Dolores? We're lucky they don't name their child "Epidural Now!"

6:05 PM  
Anonymous yoyo said...

I like all names being spelt the same.

I mostly like names that are anglo-saxon too.

6:17 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

I also don't like the underlying assumption that all childbirth is an unpleasant experience. Some women don't like any part of it; some women put up with it for the baby; some women find the experience itself to be a worthwhile way to find out what their bodies do.

6:22 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

Hee. What if you spelled ALL names the same, but you pronounced some of them Megan and Margie and Tracy and like that. That'd be awesome.

6:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree with yoyo. There's a lot to be said for diversity of names, but really: quit it with the vowyl switching, people. Besides, whose bright idea was it to embed "gyn" into their daughter's name?

MegAn: I remember your comments about "toilet-to-tap" back in the day and I thought: what's that about? Now that I live in SD and it's clearly the freakin' desert, I wonder: you've gotta be kiddin' me! We need all the water we can swing! -K.

6:30 PM  
Anonymous jim said...

Why do you assume that "Megyn" is her parents' coinage? It looks to me like a fifth grade respelling that stuck.

ajalqxsv (the verification's longer than my comment)

6:46 PM  
Anonymous Ennis said...

"I also don't like the underlying assumption that all childbirth is an unpleasant experience."

I didn't say it was unpleasant did I? I said it was painful, and except for one case where a friend gave birth (literally) in five minutes (her water broke as she walked in the door, she was wheeled into a room and the baby's head crowned), every other birth I have heard about was painful.

Of course, you've now answered your own question of how parents could name a child something like Dolores. It is a reference to something that they think of as being both painful and beautiful for what it created.

7:14 PM  
Anonymous Meagan said...

As the differently-spelled "Meagan", I rejoice in my extra vowel. My mother liked the name but wanted it to be pronounced "May-gan" instead of "Meg-an", but everyone wants to pronounce it "Mee-gan" for some reason. How annoying. :)

Unique things about us should be celebrated! I like the 'gyn', in all honesty (not that I would ever name my child that, because clearly there is a more superior form of the name available.)

7:38 PM  
Anonymous Peter said...

A kid I knew in elementary school back in Connecticut had a much older brother named Adolph. I know, the spelling's not quite the same as Mr. Hitler's, but it's still way too close for comfort. It's anyone's guess whether Adolph's parents were sadistic or merely clueless. I would suspect the latter, as they were from the very nadir of the socioeconomic scale.

Interestingly, Adolph was living proof of Johnny Cash's Boy Named Sue phenomenon, possessing truly awesome street-fighting skills. What became of Adolph I do not know, though I suspect that his current residence can be located on this map.

8:15 PM  
Blogger Megan said...


All respect to the common variants of names. But the "y" is too far for my narrow-minded self.


Good save.

8:39 PM  
Blogger Daniel said...

'Dolores', in my mind, is too closely associated with a seminal episode of Seinfeld.

8:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Spelling variants of common names shift a social cost on to the rest of us--"wait, how do you spell that?"--the cumulative effect of which is one of annoyance. And of course, it's social class laid bare: what her parents thought no doubt unique comes off as pathetically WalMart-ish.

And don't get me started on the fad of Gaelic first names; I save my ethnic self-loathing for Mar. 17th.

Brian--with an "i"

9:12 PM  
Blogger bobvis said...

Is anyone else amazed by the perfect parabola described by the graph? I realize each point represents 10 years of data. Still though, I find it interesting.

9:16 PM  
Blogger bobvis said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

9:19 PM  
Blogger bobvis said...

Oh, and I'd like to name the kids whenever they arrive after philosophers.

I am preparing to only be allowed to name the dogs though. [shrug]

9:20 PM  
Blogger fasolamatt said...

Was it Tom Lehrer that told the story of the parents who named their kid Stev3en? The "3" was silent...

5:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hate the weird spellings, but I think unconventional names can be quite cool, though difficult to pair up with a lot of last names.

My experience is that natural childbirth is not terribly painful, but can be very tiring. The body has astounding natural analgesics. Fear causes tension which causes pain. Relaxation can really help the body to birth without much difficulty. All medical pain relief for labor has side effects, and some potential side effects are actually pretty serious. You'd hear this from more women if it weren't so hard to find doctors and midwives and hospitals that truly support natural childbirth. Medically managed births are the norm in this country, so most people don't get to experience natural childbirth, even if they want to.


6:20 AM  
Anonymous Peter said...

'Dolores', in my mind, is too closely associated with a seminal episode of Seinfeld.

Except that episode is not entirely correct. The part of a lady's body which, in the world of Seinfeld, rhymes with "Dolores," in practice is pronounced much more often with a strong accent on the first syllable. Pronoucing it in that manner completely kiboshes the rhyming scheme.

6:37 AM  
Anonymous bill said...

My grandmother's name was Doris. I always thought that was weird, but turns out there was a Doris in Greek mythology. Haven't met any young Dorises recently (Doris Matsui from Sac, c'mon down!).

6:59 AM  
Blogger aram harrow said...

And let's not forget:

"She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita."

7:05 AM  
Blogger jens said...

In the Elder Days (when I was still in highschool) there was a joke in Spanish class about a girl named Dolores marrying a man named Cabeza, and thus acquiring the married name Dolores de Cabeza (headaches).

That being said, I named my son "Cameron" KNOWING it meant crooked nose (granted, that is a does not actually TRANSLATE to "crooked nose" in any language of this earth).

OK, "Megyn" is a bit off....our google frequencies are:
Megan 29,600,000
Meghan 6,250,000
Meagan 2,870,000
Meaghan 1,220,000
Maegan 328,000
Megyn 219,000
Maeghan 43,900

and there'd me a lot less of Megyn Kelly weren't a TV personality.

7:39 AM  
Anonymous Ennis said...

And don't get me started on the fad of Gaelic first names; I save my ethnic self-loathing for Mar. 17th.

What's wrong with being called Ennis? It's an old Irish name!

9:30 AM  
Blogger susan said...

My mom always said that she chose conventional spellings of my sister's name and mine because, growing up with a fairly uncommon name herself (Paulette), she was bummed that she could never find kitschy "personalized" keychains and pens and the like, as a kid. Then again, my sister was always just one of many Amys in her classes at school, so there's something to be said for having a name not many others have (though not just an unusual spelling of a common name).

9:33 AM  
Anonymous D said...

hmmm, one wonders if Megyn changed it on going into journalism to make it stick out... because Megan is so loved by so many parents... Or maybe her parents liked it, but didn't want her to be among too many Megans in school. Were you? 'Cuz THAT is a pain. I was one of 4 Davids and one of 2 David H's in grade school. there were also 3 Michaels... That's when I became a Dave H, much to my dismay. I mean, if I have to change it, can't I change it to something cool? "Pray we do not start calling you THX-1138, child" Came the voice from the robot who looked like Yul Brenner...
It was an interesting childhood...

anyone else sick of being called the most overused name in the known universe?
On the other hand, I did find lots of ethnic spelling differences, though Megyn doesn't seem to be one. Like Daffyd for example, and Martyn, and Maygan...

I don't mind cool names as much as people who get nasty when you can't guess the correct spelling of Khadija, when your childhood friend spelled it Kadidja and that was your only exposure...

12:42 PM  
Anonymous justus said...

I don't mind when people spell my name Justice but I do mind when I introduce myself as Justus and they insist on pronouncing it Justin.

1:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I met a little girl named Malisa (a variant on Melissa) once. Poor thing.

3:11 PM  
Blogger jens said...

And let's not forget Brennan.

4:33 PM  
Anonymous yoyo said...

Dislike for the class implications of someone's name is so v.

10:25 PM  
Blogger alison said...

heh - friends of mine have a daughter called Claudia (= lame) and always thought the perfect sister's name would be Cecilia (= blind).

I'm with dithers on the natural childbirth issue - painful bits, but mostly hard work etc. Your first question to someone finishing a marathon is not "was it painful?" Fortunately I live in a country where midwives are the norm.

8:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm surprised, Megan, that you're not considering the mechanical implications. Although a Y that doesn't end the name doesn't give the same writing pleasure as an ending Y, it's a simple fact that writing the letter Y is more fun, and gives more room for individual expression, than an A or, as everyone wants to spell my name, an I.

Don't take my word for it: get a piece of paper, and write Megyn 15 times. Then write Megan.

(Yes, I know that you're getting to have some fun with the G. Put having the Y follow it isn't an arithmetic, or even geometric addition of complication, but exponential.)


PS: I like the way Megyn Price lights up when she smiles. It's not unique, of course, but it's enough, even without the handwriting, to redeem the spelling.

12:46 PM  
Blogger alison said...

Ewww, no. My g's don't join onto the next letter, and neither do the y's, so a handwritten Megyn is a very jerky word.

My youngest is called Tallulah - that flows nicely in cursive - still haven't got tired of writing it in the Christmas cards ;-)

4:13 PM  
Blogger jens said...


My sister Claudia named her daughter Cecilia.

4:59 PM  
Anonymous Ennis said...

"Good save"

Is that your way of saying "Touche"?

6:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Dolores" (or the proper Latin form of it) is one of the traditional titles of Mary (sorrowful Mother, etc. etc. "Mercedes", merciful, etc.), so I tend to hear it as a very Catholic name, like a Catherine or Angela or Veronica.


4:16 PM  
Anonymous doctorpat said...

The real solution, which my parents completely failed to adopt, is to give a normal, easily spelled, first name, and a wild, crazy, second name.

At school I had a friend called, Damien Sanchai Kingston.

When he wanted to be normal, he was Damien, but as a teenager, he became Sanchai. (My spelling is a guess.)

Best of both worlds.

Patrick JOHN (sic) McAuliffe

8:13 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

As Cala points out, Dolores is an "attribute" of the Virgin in Spanish. If you think that's bad, until the last generation Angustias (Agonies) was popular among devout Spaniards on the same basis.

4:53 AM  
Blogger lil miss dubin said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

4:41 PM  
Blogger lil miss dubin said...

My Oakland friend Kat named her son Tristan. She's Swedish. He's half black, half Swedish. The name works. He's a heartbreaker already; he's six.

4:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who cares how Megyn Kelly spells her name. She's a beautiful and intelligent lady who makes watching the news enjoyable. Is this all you people have to talk about?

7:17 PM  

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