html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> From the archives: Yes, well, back to me.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Yes, well, back to me.

The nice people over at Unfogged were making suggestions for me to find a man last week. I have to say that I was just the slightest bit miffed that they would suggest Internet dating to me. Did they think that I hadn't tried all the standard approaches before flashing my desperation to the whole Internets? It's not their fault; they don't know me. For the record, because this is the kind of girl I am, I want you all to know that I always worked on my problem sets before going to the TA.

Here's an old version of the ad I had up on Salon.

Last great book I read:

These books have all helped me soooo much!!!!!

Demanding the Princess Treatment
Why Men Keep Leaving
30 Cats is Not Too Many
How to Fight without Getting Violent
Use Your Words, Not Your Fists
Living with Massive Debt
Stop Hating Your Family
How to Love Again after the Perfect Man Leaves
Managing OCD
You Can Choose Not to Cheat
No More Furious Rages
The Rules

My most humbling moment:
Karaoke is very humbling for me.

Favorite on-screen sex scene:
I always blush and hide my eyes when sex scenes come on. It’s a pain in the ass, 'cause then I have to rewind or ask my friends what happened.

The celebrity I resemble the most:
I was once told I look like Elizabeth Taylor, which I didn’t really appreciate because I didn’t know at the time how lovely she used to be.

The best or worst lie I've ever told:

It’s not so much that I lie, but I always agree with anything anyone assumes about me.

"You two must be sisters." Must be.
"You go to Davis, are you an undergraduate?" Yep.
"You, do you work here?" Uh-huh.
"So you are the pilot" Yes, ma'am.

If I could be anywhere right now:
Sitting on my front porch on a warm Sacramento evening with a Delta breeze and my friends talking and laughing.

Five items I can't live without:
my local library branch
a 175 gram frisbee
tomatoes in summer
cats with loud motors
bluegrass/old-timey music

Fill in the blank: _____ is sexy; _____ is sexier.
talking dirty is sexy; talking about something you love is sexier

In my bedroom one will find...
Bright colors and plants and my favorite childhood books.

Why you should get to know me:
Most of my academic and athletic accomplishments are pretty butch, which means I have the leeway to be femme-y in my personal life. I bake, and cook, and dance around my house in an apron. Birds were forever landing on my shoulder and singing to me, but now my cats take care of that.

The crucial things I look for:
Nice, smart, funny.

Everything else is negotiable. But I am going to respond better if you are close to my age (24-year-olds, why do you write me?), and if you like the life you have built for yourself so far.


I've had the ad hidden for a while. The guys over on the men's side are the same ones who have been there since I've started looking. I am just not brave enough to leave my ad up for months at a time. And hell, I can embarass myself here now.

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15 Comments:

Anonymous Alex said...

The Salon site is bad because it inspires people to put too much information up about uninteresting things. Like any ad, you have only a few moments to stand out. A revealing photo works wonders, but if self-respect is your thing, then you have to do it with ad copy.

While some (myself included) might find it charming that you have problems with anger, debt, obsessive-compulsive behavior and...um...finding men, it could be a bit of a turnoff for others. Other things might be seen as boring, and while I can tell that you have a certain quirky outlook on life, you should emphasize it more. You certainly manage this on your blog, from what I've read of it.

The one truly exciting thing in your profile, that you find people who can talk about the things they love sexy, is buried in a throwaway question. Yet that is a key thing to know about you. It suggests an attraction to passionate people who actually care about things, as opposed to boring people who find nothing interesting. And the men whose interest you presumably want to draw have all suffered through dates with people like that. That you would say this about yourself makes you stand out a mile, at least from my perspective.

Finally, you might want to eschew Salon and its hipsters for more technically inclined men on a site like OKCupid. Given your engineering background, you would likely find a greater intersection with the corresponding available male dating population there.

Or, to put it more plainly, you're geek bait.

- A

8:11 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

I think 'geek bait' might be the nicest thing anyone ever called me. Thanks!

8:27 PM  
Anonymous alex said...

Okay, on second read I suppose you're joking with your book list. I do feel silly for missing it, but as you see, the joke isn't obviously a joke, and, well, you only have a limited time to come across positively.

I now will retreat to my cave of obliviousness.

8:44 PM  
Anonymous Mike said...

I thought the parts of your Salon ad that were meant to be funny (and I think I caught them all) were hilarious, especially the booklist.
I'm a firm believer in when you stop stressing over an answer (in this case finding someone), it'll happen. As I say that, I've only been able to let go of that stress twice really and then proceeded to shoot myself in the foot afterwards anyway. So with my advice, caveat reador. :)

9:11 PM  
Blogger thefreefood said...

If you wanted the book list to be a joke, you need to emphasize it more. The exclamation points are a start, but it needs to be like "OMGWTFBBQ, u guyz n33d to r3ad these!!!!!!!" I know Salon hipsters are supposed to be all casually ironic, but you need to be way more obvious than that.

You have all the right ideas in your profile. Now just bang it over their heads until they get concussions and ask you on dates in their brain-damaged stupor.

10:43 PM  
Blogger capella said...

i agree with alex - it's not immediately obvious which of your answers are meant to be sarcastic, and i've noticed sarcasm and humor in general don't go over so well in profiles, but geekiness does. back when i still had some faith in the online dating process, i was most successful with a profile titled "S is for Entropy".

6:59 AM  
Blogger Continental Drifts said...

I thought that your profile was quite precious! And it was rather evident that you were sarcastic about the book list.

I'm catastrophically bad at interacting with women and reading their body-language etc, but I agree with Mike that "it'll happen" once you get over stressing over it. All my -- very brief -- dalliances occurred when I wasn't actively looking and my utter inability to pick-up on the "signs" was quite amusing in retrospect.

Indulge in your hobbies and live life as you normally do and you'll eventually find someone.

BTW, what were your favorite childhood books?

8:14 AM  
Anonymous justus said...

I thought it was obvious what parts were sarcastic. In any case, do you really want to date someone who can't tell when you're being sarcastic? I've done that before and it manages to suck all of the fun out of the conversation side of the relationship awfully fast leaving nothing but copious amounts of hot, sweaty sex in an attempt to fill that void. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

8:52 AM  
Blogger thefreefood said...

On the flip side, dating someone who doesn't pick up on your sarcasm might make things a lot more fun when the hot, sweaty sex is bad...

10:04 AM  
Blogger Cladeedah said...

Anyone who thinks "30 Cats is Not Too Many" is a serious book choice is not sharp enough for you. For what it's worth, I could tell when you were being cheeky. :-)

11:08 AM  
Anonymous Greg said...

Life's too short to date humorless people...as opposed to the standard, annoying "I must date someone with a sense of humor" requirement, it's better to actually BE funny and let the idiots screen themselves out.

12:33 PM  
Anonymous caveatBettor said...

Cat person, huh? The luster wears off a bit ...

Strangely, we loved our rottie as much as we love our daughters. (Only dog people would understand, the rest of you can keep gasping in horror).

12:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

your sarcastic book list is obviously a joke, but pokes fun at some issues that your prospective dates may have (or perceive themselves to). one or two of these things isn't such a big deal in a real relationship, but nobody's going to start a relationship happily whistling a compromising tune.

so... if i was reading this ad for a guy, i would assume that we'd probably be able to joke something ferocious, but never settle down for real heartfelt connection. we're all irked by our parents at times, our tendency to collect something akin to "cats", or feel the need to talk about something that might actually step into argument territory if the other person wasn't receptive. smart and fun as you may seem, i'd see the expiration date and move to the next one.

7:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

by the way... i'm amanda(am.kast@gmail.com), and you've got a really cool blog going on here :)

7:49 PM  
Blogger Goldie said...

Here from Greg's site, the book list is hilarious!

2:16 PM  

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