html xmlns="" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> From the archives: Anthony, you're so strong and handsome. Poke this beehive!

Friday, May 19, 2006

Anthony, you're so strong and handsome. Poke this beehive!

It might help my cause with the wives of my Ultimate teammates if I weren’t telling their husbands to be less whipped and more of a man. They’re forever “checking in” and “asking the wife” and I say that’s just weak. I was coaching Anthony, for example. At a Saturday morning pick-up, I invited him and his wife to a dinner party that evening.

Anthony: “I’ll ask Jess when I get home and we’ll call you.”

Megan: “You’ll decide if you want to go and let Jess know your decision when you get home.”

Anthony: “That’s funny. No seriously, I think we can make it, but I’ll ask Jess.”

Megan: “You’ll tell Jess.”

Anthony: “Have you seen my wife? Beautiful, terrifying?”

Megan: “Yeah. Poised, long braid, smart. Makes great desserts…”

Anthony: “Could level forests with a glance...”

Megan: “Who’s the man here? Here, we’ll practice. Say after me, ‘Honey, we’re going to Megan’s tonight.’ ”

Anthony: “Honey, Megan invited us to dinner tonight.”

Megan: “Honey, I’ve decided. Dinner at Megan’s tonight.”

Anthony: “Honey, want to have dinner at Megan’s tonight? It’ll be all Ultimate players, but they promise not to talk about it.”

Megan: “Listen, wife. Make something to bring to dinner at Megan’s tonight.”

Anthony couldn’t even say that. He was laughing too hard at the very idea. I kept a straight face the whole time but inside I was laughing too. I was hoping I could get Anthony to go home and be forceful. Just the idea is funny. I would never fuck with Jessica. She’s awesome, entirely gracious, but if she turned to me with an angry voice or stern look, I would run away very fast. She helped him out that day. She called me to rsvp; said that Anthony informed her they were going to dinner at my house. No doubt.



Blogger grant said...

I'm going to use that approach to ask women out.

"Hey there sugar-pants, I'm buying you dinner tonight."

I like the sound of that...


11:53 AM  
Blogger Megan said...

Chicks totally dig that. You should do it for sure.

Not "asking", telling. Remember?

12:22 PM  

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