html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> From the archives: If life were perfect, there would be a training montage.

Sunday, January 28, 2007

If life were perfect, there would be a training montage.

I happen to be at the café for the Regional Barista's Competition. There are lots of scruffy people in black behind the bar, being too cool to be nervous. There look to be written rules, and timed events, and judges with glasses of water to clear their palates. I wish they would tell us the rules, which I imagine have lots of jargon. I also wish there were teams in matching tracksuits, shaking out their arms and exhaling, and bringing it in for a huddle and BREAK! I will have to choose a favorite, but I can't tell who the underdog is.

I wonder what the prizes are. I wonder if winning this competition is something one puts on a résumé.


UPDATE: From the comments:
Maybe there could be a followup, "Barista!", about a clumsy, unhip, yet plucky underdog who finally wins the respect of his snobbish fellow employees at the locally owned coffee place.

What if he were totally straightlaced, with t-shirts with no message, and rode a bike with multiple gears!!!! But, during the long training runs, and lifting for strength but dexterity exercises too, they come to respect his dedication and belief in the PERFECT COFFEE DRINK. Maybe he has a gift that they can't deny, like perfect taste, or whatever perfect pitch would be, so they have to put him on the team, despite their doubts!!! BUT!! Maybe, in an accident, or an "accident" arranged by the team from the CORPORATE coffee shop, he burns his mouth! Will he get his gift back in time for the FINALS?? EVERYTHING depends on it!!!!

God. I love that movie.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

To this day, when I am nervous I spin my arms in big windmills to pop my shoulders like I used to before big swim meets.

11:54 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

To this day, when I am nervous, I smooth my bangs out of my face, so I can see the person I'm about to fight.

12:09 AM  
Anonymous bryn said...

I'm picturing a montage like from "You got served". A friend of mine's favorite movie genre is bad movies with montages. Stick it and Roll Bounce are two of her other favorites.

7:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's this kind of post that makes you awesome, Megan. -K.

P.S. Did anyone else read Michael Pollan's NYT essay on food politics and stuff? I liked it, but I was annoyed by the generalizations. I guess I'm a literalist.

7:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Did anyone see that old Tom Cruise movie, Cocktail? I think you've got your training montage of drink preparation right there.

Maybe there could be a followup, "Barista!", about a clumsy, unhip, yet plucky underdog who finally wins the respect of his snobbish fellow employees at the locally owned coffee place.

Marcus

3:36 PM  
Blogger ScottM said...

I want a training montage to skip over the hard parts of skill acquisition for me... though I suppose I could share if it would make the world a better place.

9:43 AM  

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