INTERNETS!!!!!
WE DID IT! After two years of trying, WE WON THE PORN!
It was SO CLOSE! There was a four-way tie for first place, so the tie-breaker settled the places. One poor team got nothing, and then we were next wrong on the tie-breaker, which means we came in third and WON THE PORN. I might die of happiness. AND IT WAS A TWO-DISK SET! That's right! Babelicious, with fifteen different girls! Seven and a half girls per disk! We brought home one disk and the sleeve, which I will frame and put over my mantle.
I can't stop beaming, but I also feel a new emptiness inside me. Without WINNING THE PORN, I don't know what my goals are. I can't think of another suitable ambition. Even as I bask in the joy of a longtime goal attained, I can't help but feel poignant at the end of a dream I've lived with for so long.
It was SO CLOSE! There was a four-way tie for first place, so the tie-breaker settled the places. One poor team got nothing, and then we were next wrong on the tie-breaker, which means we came in third and WON THE PORN. I might die of happiness. AND IT WAS A TWO-DISK SET! That's right! Babelicious, with fifteen different girls! Seven and a half girls per disk! We brought home one disk and the sleeve, which I will frame and put over my mantle.
I can't stop beaming, but I also feel a new emptiness inside me. Without WINNING THE PORN, I don't know what my goals are. I can't think of another suitable ambition. Even as I bask in the joy of a longtime goal attained, I can't help but feel poignant at the end of a dream I've lived with for so long.
posted by Megan at 11:04 PM
12 Comments:
Congratulations!
The achievement of a major goal ALWAYS feels like a letdown. This is why I procrastinate so badly.
You might try for porn without half-girls. As much as I like porn, half-girls make me kind of squeamish.
Let this be a lesson to everyone that anything is possible if you persistantly follow your dreams.
"I can't think of another suitable ambition."
Maybe you could write a book or something...
--mith
This comment has been removed by the author.
(previous post had link posted wrong)
Jens: half-girls explained here
http://greatbigsea.com/themusic/lyrics/the_mermaid.html
(that's html at the end)
audio snippet here:
http://greatbigsea.com/themusic/audio/thte4.mp3
"I can't stop beaming, but I also feel a new emptiness inside me."
As a man with some experience with pornography, I can tell you this feeling is the signal to go to sleep.
Back home we always say: be careful of what you wish for!
If there's only a number of wishes in a life that come true then can't afford to waste them.
"Nothing except a battle lost can be half as melancholy as a battle won."
-- The Duke of Wellington
Fasolamatt, those skilled in the art of courtly love (e.g., Thomas Capellanus) can tell you that there is no way to choose a half that does not invite derision.
Congrats on the porn! I hope it provides much masturbatory inspiration for you.
Ignore the emptiness for awhile. Bask in the glory of your achievement. A suitable new challenge will surely present itself eventually. No need to actively search one out just yet.
The world sings with you.
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