html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> From the archives: Like, mentoring.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Like, mentoring.

Bec was right. The spider on the sill over the stove is a black widow. She wasn't out when we were making food last night, but the web was messy, with strong silk. My heart sank. Bec took pictures of her late last night, and then I saw her this morning. Yep. A black widow. I like spiders, at some small distance. I'm not scared of the ones that hang in my corners and eat the mosquitoes. I helped a wolf spider out of a bucket just this morning. But black widows are just the Most Spider. The deliberate way they move, all that shiny black. Knowing they're poisonous. I'm normally brave about creech, but black widows make me shrink back and dance around.

This morning, Bec was asking me what one does with a black widow. My inclination is to pretend that it is yesterday, when I didn't know, and do nothing. She isn't anywhere you could accidentally lean against or put your hand. They aren't aggressive. There are lots of insect carcasses in her web. Live and let live, Bec. Bec said that she would be bummed to get bitten by a poisonous spider in her kitchen, and why she was looking at me? Because I'm older and I project an air of confident competence? Because it is my house, and she is renting from me? Because I'm the one who grew up around black widows? Whatever.

Well, I'll handle it tonight. I'll solve the whole thing. Bec is young, and hasn't figured out how the world works. I can teach her. Tonight, I'll sit down with Bec and have a long talk with her. We'll discuss the difference between a landlord and a slumlord, and how important it is to choose the right one.



UPDATE: I blew on her so she retreated to her nook in between the window frame and the sill. I cleaned out her web and washed the whole area down. If she returns, I will escalate. I don't like to hurt any living thing, but I will resort to a firm letter if I have to.

There was no reason that the funnier Megan had to point out that now the black widow is wandering my house at night, plotting my death. Why bring that up? It's cool though. She flinched when I told her that black widows can jump twenty feet, so I'd say we're even.

Then we got to wondering who would win if you put a black widow and a potato bug in a jar. I don't ever want to find out, but it turns out that lots of people on YouTube have had similar ideas. If you are still in ignorance about potato bugs, I envy you and plead with you to stay that way. If you wish to fall from that state of grace, there are depraved and sick people in the world who have filmed potato bugs. I will not provide you with a link.

14 Comments:

Anonymous D said...

Bug Vacuum

catch and release outside...

or get Anand to "do something..." and then pretend you don't know?

10:03 AM  
Blogger Megan said...

Anand is willing to help me with some stuff some of the time, but that is always a gift of his time that I am grateful for. I don't get Anand to do things, especially anything I wouldn't do.

10:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In an apartment in Davis, I found a black widow in the living room, tucked in the curtains for the sliding door. It was interesting to look at, so I decided to leave it alone for awhile. Eventually I forgot about it, and never saw it again.

If the web is unsightly, you can also bring it down with a duster. It's more sightly, although it leaves a black widow in your house.

It's probably not the only one.

A4

10:47 AM  
Anonymous D said...

er, 'twas a joke unexplained, but I am not surprised with your reply Megan... I'll keep it in mind in the future.

11:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd use a large plastic cup and a magazine to catch and release. Tho I'd have an assistant at the ready with some bug spray and I'd wear long sleeves and gloves.

Black Widows are so beautiful and usually no problem. One in the house, though needs to move outside. I let all the rest of them stay if they like and my fiancé doesn't see them.

Just the other day, I saw a black widow crossing the sidewalk. She was beautiful. I, unfortunately, had no good way of shuttling her off into the bushes. I hope that she didn't get stepped on.

Cheers,
Tim.

11:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't you have cats? Just knock it on the floor, and let the cats take care of it.

Justin

12:21 PM  
Anonymous Armsmasher said...

Just kill it. Find the nearest noxious chemical—buy one if you need to—and assert your right to a home free of lethal (if improbable!) threats.

1:02 PM  
Blogger Tom said...

Terrifying.

I have to say, if it is anywhere I want to be, the poisonous (or creepy-jumpy-spider) is short for the world.

Otherwise, I'll just be busy pretending they don't exist.

1:21 PM  
Blogger jens said...

> I blew on her so she retreated to
> her nook in between the window
> frame and the sill.

That's just a LITTLE creepy.

If I were Bec, I might be considering a landlady that did not blow on me.

Unless i were a lesbian.

1:32 AM  
Anonymous Peter said...

Potato bugs are cute.

6:52 AM  
Blogger Justus said...

I think you should name it Persephone and train it to hunt potato bugs. Then when it has a million baby spiders they'll hunt down all the potato bugs on earth.

8:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Katie will show you how to deal with those pesky potato bugs, M.

12:25 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

You are out of your mind if you think I'm clicking on any link that mentions potato bugs.

3:12 PM  
Anonymous jms said...

Potato bugs are kind of cute. They look like Jiminy Cricket, or like angry, muscular little babies.

Spiders on the other hand ... *whimper*

3:46 PM  

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